We struggle daily. When it comes to church, it seems as if people blame us for the behavior. Spare the rod. Having a child with RAD, there seems to be no logical consequence, because most of them have lost everything. Take away their toy because they hurt you? Well, when they were placed in custody, they lost all their toys.
Aggression comes because some don't know what love is, or it feels awkward. Love to some of our kids is being screamed at, because that is how they are used to being addressed.
What can the church do? Accept that it is not the foster or adoptive family's fault for the behavior. Our kids' brains are wired differently. Give us grace, because there are days we just want to survive. Bring treats by our house, or at church have a quiet space when a child becomes dysregulated. It is truly hard in the moment to know what to do, but a safe calm down place would help.
